I Love Love

So many things I hoped for are happening, along with many things that I never thought I'd deal with. The most beautiful and happiest thing is the smile I'm constantly getting from him. It feels good. I can talk to easily to him now, most of the time. I wave and smile and laugh and ask things I never would have thought to, months ago.

The funniest thing is that I'm not in love. In fact, letting go of that infatuation has given me a freedom of awesome proportions, in looking with interest in another direction. It's not a serious interest, but it's there. I don't deny it. And the most awesome thing of all is that I am confident and secure in his and her confidence, in their love.

I acknowledge what it used to be and let my heart be illuminated by this love and open pride.

In the midst of strange and troubling circumstances, there are a billion bright lights. That's what I see. I see a future that remains hopeful, in spite of all my shortcomings. I see a family that is not perfect, not by far, but is as close to me as my blood family. We have grown together; it's not something that is easily thrown aside.