After-Thoughts

It feels like some things in my life are slipping away from me, and all I can do is stretch out my hand only to have it grasp empty air. In the next moment, though, it is bumped by something new and shiny, and I hold that instead of the old thing that I silently, desperately, watch float away from me.

Kids Camp brought out a leadership side of me that I didn't know ran so deeply. It gave me confidence in who I am and who I can be. It filled me with a passion for kids and their stories, their hearts, and their bright futures.

Kids Camp revealed a side of me that I want to deny and run from, only because running towards it is so painful and heart-breaking. I want to have a husband so badly that I can taste it and it's all I dream about nowadays, and yet I want to be independent and single for a long, long time. I want to get married young and yet I hate the very thought of it.

Kids Camp showed me that I did have a first love, and that it will be so hard to get over. It shames me that it was who it was, but it doesn't really. It's logical that I would fall in love with him, but at the same time, I am sorrowful about it. Why couldn't my first love have been a sad summer boy, or a wild young rocker?

I close with these lyrics.

You and I

We might be strangers

However close we get sometimes

It's like we never met

But you and I

I think we can take it

All the good with the bad

Make something that no one else has,

But

You and I

You and I

Me and You

What can we do

When the words we use sometimes are misconstrued

Well I won't guess

Whats coming next

I can't ever tell you're

The deepest well

I've ever fallen into

Oh I don't wanna know

Oh I don't wanna know

Oh I don't need to know

Everything about you

Oh I don't wanna know

And you don't need to know

That much about me